i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Randomize
