The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Randomize
