can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Randomize
