i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Randomize
