we made out on top of his cat.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
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how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
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I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
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