I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
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