my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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