I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
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Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
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He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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