dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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