I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
