Yo dont text me then not text me
fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize
