But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
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What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
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I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
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