So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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