On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
that may or may not have been my penis.
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