I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
Randomize
