I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
