Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
Randomize
