I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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