She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
