She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
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