Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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