ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
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