grandma shit on top of the toilet
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
Randomize
