is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
Randomize
