Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize