What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
