i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
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