why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Randomize
