I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Randomize
