i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
How external is "for external use only"?
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
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