at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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