Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
And then my night got REAL pukey
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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