yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize
