Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
Who died my cat blue again?
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Randomize
