At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
