Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Randomize
