tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
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