all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
The Olympian is in my bed
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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