Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
Randomize
