the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
stop calling my apartment porn island.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
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