I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
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I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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