I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize