You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
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