We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize
