P.S. I can't hear my feet
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
Randomize
