i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
Randomize
