You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
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