Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
