a queef is a wish your heart makes.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
Randomize
