She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is my gift to your gina
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
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